I believe a lot of the typical qualities such as mutual respect,
friendship, attraction, and loyalty are important in committed relationships. I
also think shared life goals, similar views on family, and openness are key to
a happy, successful marriage. In order to share your life with someone, you
should want similar things in life. Another important component of a committed
relationship is the promise to stay with someone through thick and thin and to
accept them for all they are, both the good and bad. Nobody is perfect, and
part of finding healthy love is accepting and celebrating one’s imperfections. I
think a lot of television, movie, and music portrayals of love include these
qualities along with the more dramatic parts of love. For example, in “Dark
Side,” Kelly Clarkson sings, “Everybody’s
got a dark side… Can you love mine? Nobody’s a picture perfect, but we’re worth
it.” In “Makin’ Me Fall in Love Again,” Kellie Pickler mentions that a
long-term relationship takes work. She says, “ I gotta tell you there’s nothin’
better than you and me together, workin’ on forever.” Carrie Underwood talks
about selfless love in “Who Are You,” singing “Who are you, the one for whom I’d
really gladly suffer.” Blake Shelton references God’s role in love in “God Gave
Me You.” He sings, “God gave me you for the ups and downs. God gave me you for
the days of doubts. And for when I think I lost my way.” “You and Me” by Dave
Matthews Band talks about the endless possibilities two people have in love. The
song shows two young people in love with the whole world to see.
I don’t believe in soul mates. I don’t think that there is
only one person out there for everyone, and that only that person can make them
truly and completely happy. I think there are many people that can make someone
happy and love them completely. I think the idea of soul mates sets unrealistic
expectations that will only disappoint people later. I think it is much more
practical to see the search for “the one” as a search for one person who can
make them happy. That one person could be any number of people, not just one
single person whom we should search for.
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